Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

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Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

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- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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How do you put elephant in refrigerator? Open the door, and put the elephant in

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Equal rights!

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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Whats long and red all over? This Cut on my arm, i should get it checked out.

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A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

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So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

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Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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