Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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How did the little boy with cancer run in his running race??? Very Well....

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What do you call a cup that holds liquid A cup

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Why? Why not?

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: my red painted d*ck

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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Jovan

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try to find the 1 thumbs up if you find it! 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Why do black people love kool aid? It is cools them down on a warm summer day and it tastes great! OHHHH YEAAAAHHHHH

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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