roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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Q) What did the Irishman get for his birthday? A) Drunk

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what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

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Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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What type of party do you throw when your fat? A baby shower.

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if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 10 dollars you would have 5 dollars more than Chuck Norris

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Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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What's the new green? Green

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Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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