A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

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Barack Obama, Mother Teresa and Stephen Hawkings had race. Who won? Barack Obama. This deduction can be made as Stephen Hawking is severely disabled by a motor neurone disease known as amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. Henceforth, he has very limited control over the majority of his body and is confined to a electric wheel chair. Thus, he could not participate competitively in the race. Moreover, Mother Teresa is dead. This unfortunate occurrence was caused by several myocardial infarctions in combination with pneumonia. Regardless of this, Mother Teresa's meek and frail build would slower her speed considerably; in comparison to Barack Obama's relatively athletic and robust frame. Nonetheless, President Obama is a smoker. Therefore, he may experience symptoms associated with emphysema during the race, causing him to retire. As such no-one would finish the race, leaving the spectators feeling very disappointed and empty.

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There was a boy and..........his dad said to go to the store to get his daily thing.........he went to the store and bought it......he came home and said.....HERE ARE THE EGGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Did you know that Claire Seiter likes to drinkapplseiter? No. Oh well she does..

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

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Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

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Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

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What is better than a Beer? Two Beers.

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What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

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Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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