A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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What is worse than going to school? Nothing.

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What did the homosexual give in his secret box? important papers from work.

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Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Why did the football player walk so funny? He went to Penn State!

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Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops