Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Boys have swag, real men have class

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

thumb_up thumb_down +21

like most people my age. im 27

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you stop a plane? Land it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops