What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

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Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

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An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

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Why wouldn't they give Helen Keller a driver's liscense? Because she was a woman.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

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Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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