If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

Why did the blond fall down? She died.

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

i put a oie in the oven, it baked

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

Q: Why do Indians smell? A: Cause they have noses? Racist.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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