Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

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Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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What did the Shark attack victim say just before she died from her injuries? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

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Sarah Palin's political campaign

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Stop me if you heard this one before.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

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Why did the Hindu eat the Mongolian? He tried, the Mongolian raped him.

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How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

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Father "Why so down son?" Son "I've always been this short..."

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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What did the pirate order for breakfast? Pancakes.

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if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana? Knock knock Who's there? Banana Knock knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you glad you don't have cancer?

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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