I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

This is just like Facebook. If you guys want to like comments, or even comment on them, just get Facebook.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

thumb_up thumb_down -12

RACIST JOKE Why did the racist cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops