Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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roses are red, violets are blue, penis

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

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Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

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Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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