what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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What's the difference between you and a sick duck? I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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Why did the boy fall off the swing?

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Why did Logan lose his lunch? Because he forgot to his lunchbox on the day-trip.

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what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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