Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

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Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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Why did the bunny hit the drum? It didn't because it did not have the mental capacity or physical capabilities to do so

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joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

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A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

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why couldn't the girl sit down? she didn't have a butt.

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My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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