What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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your so fat. your fat!

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A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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What's brown and sticky? Syrup.

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What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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Yup, I 100% agree with all the jokes that were made below this post. Chad's pretty gay.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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matt is fat

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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