2 guys walk into a bar the first gys says id like a beer the second guy says me to

Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

I completely thought you where bullshitting me, how come I never noticed before? How and why?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

Bob Saget that is all

A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

Poker? I barely even know her.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

want more?

You know whats annoying? Steve

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

A baby seal walks into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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