A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks: "How's the family?" The Horse says: "they are fine." Everyone runs out screaming because Horses can't talk, except the bartender. He has a mental illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If you put two black men in an empty room, what will they do? They will most likely try to figure out why they have been put in such a confusing scenario. Then one of the black men will suggest the possibility that maybe they are being used as a subject of a joke. The other black man agrees then they both hang themselves since they have no other purpose in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does two plus two equal? 4

thumb_up thumb_down +8

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops