roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Here come the elephants over the hill!

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

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Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

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Roses are red. I f***** a dude. you're a failed abortion. I never loved you.

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Mum says therirs ups in life... I have the Downs

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What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

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My spelling is horrible

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Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

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What do you call a 2 storied house ? A dolphin! :D

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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