what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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A Jew walks into Macy's

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

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Q: Why is it so that antijokes often give you a funny answer? A:.... *hayroll* *crickets* Moral: Im the MoranautBitch!

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

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What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

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A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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