A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was stapeled on to the elephant.

There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

An escalade with 5 black men crashes off a cliff and all of them die. this is terrible. an escalade seats 7.

why did a guy try to rob me? because he was black.

A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

Q: Why is the sky green? A: It's not

Once a upon of time, cow said chicken go cluck. Years later, mustard was like a ketchup. I said it was good. Oh yea baby. It was a good day.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

Whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding out that that apple was the tip of a dick

What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

Q: What can a black man do that a llama can't? A: Walk

A drunk guy walks into a bar. He orders a beer and the bartender says "Hey pal, you look and act really drunk, I don't think I can serve you any more alcohol." The man looks up to the bartender and says "You're right, I'm really drunk."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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