What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

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An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

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WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

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Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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