why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

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What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

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How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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George Lopez never said anything funny in his life.

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What's the humor in an elevator? Me jumping up and down yelling we r all gonna die.

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What did one dolphin say to the other after watching a banana dance with an afro. My pancreas was replaced with a mango.

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Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

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Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

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Why did the gitl fail her cooking class? Because she was abused and severely beaten by her teacher

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

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roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

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what is the differrence between a boy and girl their oranges

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I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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