Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

An epileptic man attends a rave.

What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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