What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

Jamie Oliver eats a chip

What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

why did the zebra cross the road?

why did you poop because you are a poop

You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

penis

A baby seal walks into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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