What's heed and has wheels? Your mom.

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Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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To momma's missing so many teeth it looks like her tongues in jail

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The original anti joke. What is jeopardy?

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Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

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I feel like making a good joke.But i cant. YN

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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A devout Christian dies. Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Fags aren't allowed in Heaven.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Why was the homosexual sad? Because his parents kicked him out, it was illegal for him to be married, and he had a difficult time being accepted by the society into which he was born.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

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"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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