Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

What do you call two dog? dogs

Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

why did superman die, aids he got from wonder women

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

So a bar walks into a man...

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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