If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson bleeding, I spelled " red" wrong

What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

Kindness is like peeing in your pants, Everyone can see the results, but only You can feel the warmth

Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

What ryhmes with turtle rape

Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

To momma's missing so many teeth it looks like her tongues in jail

Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

who do we all like george goodburn

A man walks into a boar. The tusked beast accepts his apology.

What's white and black? Color blind.

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

roses are dead violets are gross guess what i'm in your closet

Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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