Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

who do we all like george goodburn

A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

What's white and black? Color blind.

What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

roses are dead violets are gross guess what i'm in your closet

The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

A man walks into a resteraunt and joins his friends. Then he realized he had no friends. ~YN~

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Kittens are orange, puppies are grey, and they both make good pets

What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

How did the terrorist die? He flew a plane into a twin tower

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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