A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops