Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

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Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

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a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

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What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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What do you do when you see someone from the kkk? Accept what you saw and move on with your day

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

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what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

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What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

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Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

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what did the McDonald's cashier say to the fat man ordering a large chocolate milkshake? you want some fries with that shake?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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