Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why didn't the man win the lottery? Because his lottery numbers weren't drawn.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

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the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

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Q: which of the following is a prime number? A: 17

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

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Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

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yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

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WNBA

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops