Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have the Cadillac, Get the Guns

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

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France had one revolution

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

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Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

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There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

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why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

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2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

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Why do we park in driveways and drive in parkways? Good question.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

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Why doesn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it makes him mean.

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops