What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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Color Blind people are so stupid that they can't even see color. I've been seeing color since I was a small child. They are so stupid.

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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A Jew, Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. They have fun there a good time and then they go home.

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Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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What does? 42

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man said to the bartender "I'll have a H2O, please." His friend said "Yeah, I'll have a H2O too." The bartended wasn't an idiot and was aware that he was in a bar, not a science lab, and handed them both a bottle of H2O. His friend still died.

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

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It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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