What's do you call a prostitute in a hospital? A concerned parent.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

silver bullet?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: Why does the black guy eat watermelon A: Because it's a delicious nutritious snack

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The man walked into the church and stayed there.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock knock Who's there? Banana? Knock knock Who's there? Banana Knock knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you glad you don't have cancer?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops