Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

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What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

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Denard Robinson

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what is the biggest lie in the whole world? -please drink responsibly

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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What have the TV programmes Shameless, The Jeremy Kyle Show and Benidorm all have in common? They are all examples of modern British society

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Q. What do you call a white guy with a black dick? A. Gay

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

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How do you get someone off a swing? ask them politely.

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All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination" and then he was resuscitated and became an atheist.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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what did the iPhone say to the other iPhone. we should not worry about that because iPhones are mute

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What starts with the letter P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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This stuff on espn about Jason Collins is very gay

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Why do you do when a homeless man asks you for money Scream bicycle and then run

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

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Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

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why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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