What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

the NAACP

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls over.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

Whats long, black, and fat? The line at KFC

How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

Why is Obama black Because his parents were black

What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

A man walked into a bar owch

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...