What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? He thought he saw a ghost.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am colorblind I hate my life

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Yo mamas so fat she is obese

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Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

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A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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ccjcjcjcjcjcjjcjcjcjjcjcjcjcjcjcjccjcjcj why

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

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Please don't shoot me

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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