Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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What did the president do for the people? ...

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

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Eric is gay Ha

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What is older than history?

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Patient: Doctor, it hurts when I run, I might have arthritis. Doctor: Let me check.... 5 minutes later... Doctor: It turs out you have 3 bullets in your legs. Patient: Ohhh, I get it now.

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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the world is made out of 4 things. protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons

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J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

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What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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