- Anti Joke

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

-9

Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

-9

What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

-9

Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

-9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot lacked flying skills and experience.

Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

Why was the man "hanging around"? He committed suicide.

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Its very nice.

Why did the car stop To buy drugs

Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

Your mam is so fat.

The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

The duck didn't cross the road.

Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

Anti Joke

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