When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

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And so the baseball says to the tractor........ Your not my dad

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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no im only tryin to keep it real like a broken peice of cheese.

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

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What's long, hard and full of semen? An erect penis prior to ejaculation.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

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What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

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Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

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As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor. wheres my tractor

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A woman went for a midnight jog. She's been missing for 12 years now.

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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