What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

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Why couldn't the Asian man satisfy a woman? He was in a coma.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

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What do you call a black man at school the janitor

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Q-Why did the man fall out of the behemoth A- he had no legs

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

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A man used a ruler to measure his foot, it was size 11

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what will hit the ground first an apple or Obama The apple, obama was stopped by a rope

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Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

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This is an anti- joke

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roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

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What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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What's both fun and a scam? -The holocaust

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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