Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

Why did the weiner dog puncture Doris's bladder? It got carried away during an oral sex session.

Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

What did Jeff do to the bench? He sat on it

Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? The black man eats chicken.

Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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