Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

Who wants water? I do.

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

Roses are Red, I have a phone, Nobody texts me, Forever alone.

aodhan hearty

Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

What is your name? My name is Jeff

good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

Neither did she.

Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

Q) What do you call a black man swinging from a tree? A) A very silly man as it is potentially dangerous

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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