Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

thumb_up thumb_down +19

the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

thumb_up thumb_down +19

how did harry styles get in one diretion god

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops