What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

taking out the trash... at night

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

What's white and looks like paper? Paper

Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

What's worse then Justin Bieber? 9-11

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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