You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

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Writing is hard Poems are strong I am muslim And this is a bomb.

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

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What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

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What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

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What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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