A man recently set the world record for jumping into a foot of water from 50 feet high. Luckily, this made the clean-up rather simple.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

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here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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A chicken , a dog and a horse walked into a bar. There were going to the vets but were confused.

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what is black and is a really bad neighbor. your bad neighbor wearing a black shirt.

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A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

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Nah

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What did the waitress do when the man asked for pizza? She ran away

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what starts with 's' and ends in 'ex' and muslims get a stiffy from it semtex.

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Abe Lincholn had a son, But he died

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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