Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

identical jokes get different votes.

A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

What's the difference between a duck?

Barack Obama.

Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

stephen hawking walks into a bar...

Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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