hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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Roses are red. They also have thorns. Their family is Rosaceae and they are often given as gifts between lovers. They grow in well drained and fertile soils...

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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what did katness save her Life? because peter hates her and katness is peaches and peter dies in the titanic because it is gay shut up becky

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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Whats funny? Your face.

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Your mom's so ugly that after being ridiculed for for year she became very self conscience and killed herself. Her family was very sad for many years.

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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A man wins 1 million dollars on the pokies. He goes home and tells his wife and kids about the big win. The next day the man goes go the casino and and loses the 1 million as he is addicted to gambling

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what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

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Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

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Q: If two lesbians are in a relationship, who makes the sandwiches? A: They both do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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