Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears Because he's a rabbit

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Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

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What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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Why Didn't The Teenager Bring His Report Card Home to His Parents? Because He Was Murdered By Thugs Walking Home From School.

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When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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A: Do you like it B: No

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Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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wormly wormly sat on the worm theworm said wormly and went to warmly

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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What's black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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Please ignore this statement.

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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