Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Cheese on toes

You idiot.

A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

What do you call a man who kills others for his own amusement? A psychologist

Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

what is brown and sticky? a stick.

Boy: what to hear a joke? girl: sure. Boy: woman rights.

Nothing. He made it home safely.

What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

What did the mother say to her child that was washing the dishes? "Sweep the floor."

What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

Yo momma so stupid, she's stupider than this joke.

What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

Why did Johnny's pants fall down? Because he was fat.

a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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