Two women get in the shower at the same time, because they both start work at 8:00am and have commutes of similar length.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the jerk say to the Mexican? You are a Mexican

thumb_up thumb_down -11

a terrorist walks into a bank and says "gimme all the money or ill kill you" the bank owner said you and what army the terrorist said this army and no one came in buuuut he opened hi jacket and there was a bomb straped to him then he exploded it Buuuuuuut in hell he thinks hang on a minute i didn't get my money oh for goodness sake Buuuuuuuuuuut in heaven the bank man said i still live in a wonderfull place and anywhay we had no money left and i was going to suiside soooooooooooooooooooooooo you done me a favour and if i would of suiside i could of gone to hell but you killed me so i edidnt go to hell buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut you did lol by the way i just wasted your time

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Mohamed is driving a taxi to the airport at 20mph How many pounds of explosives are strapped to his chest?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how do demolish a building alkekwhakbar

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why couldn't the blonde change the lightbulb? she couldn't find the leperchaun at the end of the rainbow

thumb_up thumb_down -11

so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jamie Oliver eats a chip

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock Knock Who's There ........................ ........................................... I hate doorbell ditchers

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops